There's No Such Thing As Giving Someone Too Much Attention - Or Is There?

A lot of people haven’t had a date in a long time. COVID-19 complicated many people’s love lives, putting them out of the game for a few years. Normal life has mostly resumed, however, and people are starting to date again.

There's No Such Thing As Giving Someone Too Much Attention - Or Is There?
[image: unsplash]

If you haven’t had a date for a while, then you’re probably going to be a bit rusty. A big mistake that a lot of people make when dating again for the first time in a while (or for the first time) is overwhelming their love interests and giving them too much attention.

This post will explore this topic in more detail, explaining how giving someone too much attention can actually damage your relationship with them.

Love Bombing

Love bombing is a term that’s given to a manipulation tactic, which involves overwhelming a person in order to influence their behavior. Studies have found that people who love bomb others are also more likely to abuse them. Before addressing this post’s main topic and explaining how giving a person too much attention can damage one’s relationship it is important to cover love bombing. If you are the recipient of a love bombing, then you need to seriously reconsider your relationship. It can be very challenging to spot (and very hard to see that it’s a problem because it can be quite pleasant, actually). Experts say that it is important to refuse a person’s attempts at love bombing and to ask them to respect your boundaries.

Seeming Needy

One of the main dangers of giving a person too much attention is that it can make you seem needy. Nobody wants to start a relationship with a person who’s needy. Seeming needy can make people stop wanting to talk to you. When a person seems needy, they appear desperate and even pathetic. The best way to avoid this is to not send too many messages, not to come on too strong, and not to compliment your crush too much. Too many compliments can also be very irritating for the recipient (and can be an early sign of love bombing).

Annoying Them

When you give a person too much attention, it can be very annoying. Even if they don’t perceive your behavior as being manipulative or needy, it can still irritate them. And, if you irritate your crush, they may not want to talk to you anymore. After all, why would they want to continue talking to somebody who’s more of a nuisance than anything else? Many people will keep their annoyance quiet at first, so you might not even know that you are irritating them. The best way to avoid annoying them is to be respectful and polite, and not to overwhelm them.

Moving Quickly

When you give a person too much attention it can seem like you are moving too quickly. Moving too fast can be another sign of desperation and neediness. If the person to whom you have been speaking only wants a casual relationship, then this can be a real turn-off, too. If they don’t want a serious relationship and you’re moving too quickly, then they will probably terminate things with you (or at least ask you to back off for a while).

Creepy Behaviour

Sending a person too many messages, seeming needy, and really exhibiting any of the characteristics outlined in this post so far can make you seem like a creep. A creep is the last thing you want to look like if you have just started a new relationship. Seeming like a creep can be a detriment to the future of your relationship and can make the person to whom you have been speaking not want to talk to you anymore. The best way to avoid being creepy is to be respectful, polite, and most importantly of all, not to come off too strongly.

[image: unsplash]

Overstepping Boundaries

Finally, when you send a person too many messages and overwhelm them with attention, you can actually end up overstepping boundaries. Overstepping a person’s boundaries can lead to them not wanting to talk to you anymore. The reason for this is quite simple, really. If you would overstep their boundaries in the early days of your relationship, then why wouldn’t you continue to do this when you have been together for a while? Avoid overstepping boundaries so that you don’t end up in a situation like this. You may actually want to ask your love interest what their boundaries are before you start talking so that you can avoid overstepping them.

Giving a person too much attention, interest, and affection can be very bad for your relationship with them. If possible, find out what a person’s boundaries are so you don’t cross them, and never overwhelm a person with love.a

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